my apologies, dearest Emily

i heard a fly buzz when i killed
the realness in the boom
was like the realness in my cares
between these ears of storms
my breath – gathering squirms
in the last onset when the kings –
force witness – in the boom
i held my keepsakes –
pined away – what ocean of me was tangible

then it was there i supposed a fly –
between the light and me –
with truth – a certain stumbling buzz –
with force my shadow sailed – because
i could not bear to see

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